Genevieve's Place

I think I'm caught somewhere between worried and happy. Figure that one out.

I've decided there will be no 'Christmas Party' this year. Cry if you have to. Christmas Party as in mine. Mine as in, it would've been the sixth year in a row. Sad isn't it? Don't worry, I'll be around at Christmas if you really want to see me. But, exams do go until the 23rd (grrr!). I think I'm not having it this year because, I mean I could have the money for it, but I don't want to spend it on that. I do have the time, but I don't want to spend it on that. Oh, if I were left to my own devices and was allowed to have whatever food and/or drink I wanted and was deemed acceptable, it would be the best party of the year. It would be the people of course that would make it a good party. Which is a paradox you see. Yet, I'd find myself making cookies and buying bottles of Coke for this party. See? I can be harmless if I try. So, the paradox. I...don't...want to be...hmm, I don't know how to put this. I like being at home for one reason. Sadly (perhaps), it's family. I don't look forward to seeing anyone else. Really I don't. And when I'm here, I do homework and not much else. Watch TV I suppose. And eat. But that's life and I'm okay with it. Actually to be honest I'm enjoying learning quite a bit.

Everyone changes.

Posted by Jen at 9:44 PM | Permalink | Comments

All ****ed up and no place to go. Fill in the 'blank'. I was going to go to Oktoberfest tonight. No, not to get drunk, duh. Just to do the first implusive thing all year! Cherise called me at 10:30 and I actually agreed to go. And I actually wanted to. So I got dressed (and I looked good!) and I straigtened my hair (even better!) and I wore more makeup than usual (hottie!) And all this with the help of my AWESOME roommates, who are cooler than cool. Then Cherise calls and says her windshield wiper falls off, so we can't go. Frick, we all collectively thought of different ways to pull this off, but to no avail. I went to depths I've never been to. I almost called people. You know, people. I was super disappointed, but once again my roommates rock. Rae almost came with me to Wiseguys on campus, but after all it is raining. And we didn't know the hours. And, it is Rae (right, Rae?). So, here I am sitting with too much makeup on and in my pajama pants. My comfort food was pancakes (yes, my only junk food) with hot chocolate powder sprinkled in various ways. I feel better. Thanks for listening.

Posted by Jen at 1:08 AM | Permalink | Comments

I'm going through my second bowl of chocolate pudding. I had to make my own freakin' pudding, so strapped for junk food I am. I can't believe I've made it this far without having a whole stash. But I guess the guilt of having someone else pay for it might do it. Today thus far I have completed the absolute minimum amount of homework so that might not be too panicked tomorrow. Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays suck. Tonight I feel I don't know, sick or off or something for some reason. I got the internet here last night, I feel very underwhelmed about it at the moment. I think I made my first new friend today (woo! three cheers!). After my math lab I got talking to a girl who just transfered into my class, so I guess she just wanted to know stuff, but I'm saving a seat for her tomorrow. Woo for me.

Friendships sometimes can be a bit much work when only one party is interested huh? When one pursues too much, an outside party or even the seemingly uninterested party could conclude someone was wanting more out of the relationship then there is. Which totally isn't the case. I mean, can we all just be friends?! Why can't you just freakin call me?????

Oh, oh oh oh...I'm probably buying a car!! I'm so pumped! WOOOO! It's a 1994 sunbird (chicken, ha!) and it's my brother-in-laws, so therefore it's in great condition. I'm kinda pumped.

Today in Psychology, my professor asked if there was anyone who didn't believe in evolution. We were studying psychological perspectives. Being in the almost front, I definetly didn't have the advantage of being able to look around without looking like a complete eejit. So, surprising myself, I just raised my hand almost immediatly (or I'd like to think immediatly anyway). I didn't see anyone who raised their hand, and I sure got looked at. I couldn't see, but judging by my prof's reaction, I'd guess less than 10 people out of 200 raised their hand. Lets hope the rest were undecided, eh?

Posted by Jen at 10:45 PM | Permalink | Comments

blah-dy, blah-dy, blah....ah home for the weekends. So good. But so not. I get distracted from homework like 5000000 times as easily. There's the internet here! Woo, but hopefully on Monday I will be benefiting from the great home internet connection I have been so 'patiently' waiting for. Let's hope anyway. Homework has pretty much consumed my life, and I'm completely okay with that, and I don't know why. It's just good to learn. I get home from school, watch Oprah/Dr. Phil (when did I start doing that?!) and do homework for the evening, stopping every half hour to pester my roommates or eat something. Most often both. But I don't mind going out once a week or not at all. I'm not in the city to go out. Or God forbid meet people. Even if I started talking about so-called 'cute' guys on campus what would be the point. Who cares if an individual is aesthetically pleasing to me? What difference does it make in my life? Does it help me take better notes in history? Well, pretty much nothing could help me there. Does it help me read my textbooks faster? Or do better at understanding my math teacher's Slavic accent? Uh, no. It's fun now not trying to be attractive, because no one would notice either way anyway, it's so freeing. Woo, university!

Posted by Jen at 1:03 AM | Permalink | Comments

As you can probably obviously tell, we don't have the internet at our place yet, which is what brings me here to the library to use..uh, a public internet connection *shudders*. Anywhoo, In about an hour, I will be psychologically tested...ha, just kidding. As intro-psych students, we have to participate in experiments in the psych department as part of our final grade. But that's not important. Today I checked my email after a couple days of not, and I was actually happy with what I found, like actually 3 personal emails!! Woo! That made my day. Now, off to be tested.

Posted by Jen at 1:33 PM | Permalink | Comments

Well, back to school now I guess. Back to the 'Pasadena Pit'. Ah, good times. I'm just looking forward to having everything in a routine so that it's not such an effort to do things. And getting the internet. Very looking forward to that. This weekend I sewed myself a curtain for my closet. Everyone else has bright bright yellow, but she ran out of fabric like that so she gave me some funky stuff with a yellow-orange pattern and I made my own. Fun times on a Saturday night. I think I'm going to keep accumlating food over the course of the year, I just keep getting more and more, and therefore, I just keep eating it. It's awful.

Tomorrow night, me and Cherise are going to the quad to watch Farenheit 9/11. Woo, not really looking forward to the movie itself, naturally. But getting out, is very very good. Well, I better get back.

Posted by Jen at 6:30 PM | Permalink | Comments

I made it! I'm home! One week of school down...about four years of them to go. It was just a few classes, and two actual lectures. Two of my teachers, not sure they have a firm grasp on the English language, so I'm a tiny bit worried about it. Especially Economics, can't understand anything. When you get a few words deciphered, you discover, she's not actually making real sentances. I've tried to switch stuff around, but it looks like all the good professors/time slots are taken, and all that's left are the 8:30 classes with crappier profs. That's just what's on my mind right now. That and my place is...dark.small.depressing.

One of the best things so far I've found is...that I'm completely invisible. I can walk down a sidewalk (or wherever) and no one gives me a second glace, if even a first one. I usually feel self-conscious walking among large groups of people, but here, no one cares if I wore makeup this morning (I always do) or if I wore the same pants I did yesterday, or how I did my hair. I guess that's why so many people feel the freedom to be individuals, because, no matter what you do, nobody, in general, will care in the slightest.

Posted by Jen at 9:52 PM | Permalink | Comments

I guess, this is it. Tomorrow I'm moving out. I don't know when it hit me. I think after the third movie at the triple feature tonight. Tomorrow night I'll be sleeping in a different bed, I'll make my own supper, if I so choose to! I realize I was away for the whole summer, but this is different. It may be small and dingy, but it's mine!! (well, ours) We won't have phone and therefore internet until Wednesday or later, but I doubt anyone'll notice. Pretty soon I'll be typing in my own room. I'll be waking up and going to school! For real!

As I said, Kendra, Mel T and I went to the triple tonight. It was alright. First was Spiderman 2, then White Chicks, then 13 Going on 30, which was better than I remember. It was...good times. Well, I better get some sleep! Moving day!

Posted by Jen at 3:03 AM | Permalink | Comments

I feel...poor. Yesterday, I went to the city with my mom and little sisses. We dropped off some of my stuff at my new place, and got to witness first-hand the cleaning schedule, with the nice little footnote of something to the effect of cleaning our owns rooms is our responsibility. Um, I can predict a little bit of head bashing coming on. Anyone who knows me knows I am incapable of keeping my own room clean. Who's business is it anyway? duh. As well, the sign in the bathroom that said one shower per day per person was also a sight to behold. I keep thinking that we must have some kind of privacy rights, and then I remember that I never signed a lease, or any document at all. I'll make it through.

Then we went to the campus, and I spent more than I ever had until this very morning. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE TEXTBOOKS ARE? Well, I guess most people do, but I'd like to take this oppurtunity to say that I'm open to any and all charitable donations. This morning I paid my tuition, which was more than twice as much as the textbooks. Did I mention I didn't even buy all the textbooks? I figured that I'd wait and see if I'll need some of the optional ones. I will probably, this just breaks it up a little.

Oh, before I forget again, huge shoutout to Damon who signed my guestmap. I love people who sign my guestmap. If you sign my guestmap, I love you forever. *hint*

I also went grocery shopping for the first time today (for groceries I mean). Okay, so my mom paid and she will be paying for the rest of the year, but still. First time for just me! Hmm, easy mac, wheat tins (ha), pasta, oatmeal(!), and you know the usual stuff, bread, milk, margarine. No meat though. Not quite yet. How exciting is my shopping list!

Posted by Jen at 5:25 PM | Permalink | Comments

Hey, how's it going? In a few minutes, I'm going out for coffee with my near future roommates. One, a close friend of mine, the other, an eventual close friend of mine. Lets hope anyway. Most things have to go smoothly this year, right? I might have a tough time with my land lady, but I might just have to give it a chance. But if she turns out be another parent, again, then, in the worst-worst case scenario I would find another place to live. A plus, could be a minus, thing about my place is that I never signed anything, they don't have any information on me, never did a reference check on me. All they have from me is one month's rent. Which month? Who knows, I guess it's just their free money. Allegedly, it's to hold my place. Geez, I wish I had moved to an apartment. I know I'm not there yet, and it WILL be a kickass year, I just feel like I'll be missing out. No boys, no....parties? Like more than one friend over? I don't even know. What I do know is that she's already made us a cleaning schedule. Talk about pre-emptively being assumed to be immature. After this summer, I'm less and less apprehensive of confrontation. Usually I'd rather die than discuss something I'm not happy about, but there might be some discussing going on.

Posted by Jen at 8:31 PM | Permalink | Comments